Loan Ranger: Beleaguered bankers battle for a blissful break
Many market participants decamp to Cornwall for their summer breaks - in fact it is seemingly where the whole market has absconded to over the last couple of weeks, but with varying results.
Cornwall is a nice place and the Prime Minister goes there on his holidays too, don't you know.
But the best laid plans of bankers and parents often go awry and Cornwall can also be an unforgiving place. One loans banker described being held up for eternity on the journey there in a car of sick, wailing young children stuck in motorway traffic.
Desperate measures forced the father to dose his children on medication for the nausea, which also caused drowsiness as a welcome side-effect. Yet said banker was greeted at his destination by driving rain, raging winds and then the sick-covered kids woke up with a vengeance.
Another banker heading to the promised land of milk and honey (and pasties) also faced offspring-related obstacles. This time, on the train.
He also spent the whole of his merry journey cajoling bored children and dealing with constant demands for food and entertainment. That journey ended with grim weather too and having to be locked up with his little darlings for the entirety of his stay. Suddenly having a debate with borrowers on documentation regained a certain appeal.
The Ranger, however, has not yet been blessed by children and enjoyed a blissful and uninterrupted four hour nap on the train to Cornwall.
No snacks had to be provided to small people, no episodes of Pepper Pig to be played on a sticky iPad en route. On arrival, the sky was clear and the sun shone warm and welcoming.
Ok, we'll get our coat.