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Bankers and their (not) so funny jokes


We in the banking industry always like to think of ourselves as charming, funny individuals. How could we not be, since most of us, bar the incomprehensible quants, earn our money by flogging stuff.

The trick I have found most useful down the years is to learn every single superstitious belief going — and in Asia there are many. Issuers and investors love all that stuff, and it also comes in handy in social situations.

However, Feng Shui and horoscopes are old hat. Keeping my finger on the pulse, I am now right up to speed on the latest Korean craze that is sweeping across the world. Yes, I have been learning about the intriguing intricacies of blood types.

In Korea, knowing blood types is apparently the second most important thing there is. The first, of course, is alcohol. By learning someone's blood type, you will be able to tell anything about them, from their personality, to their ideal partner. Google it if you don’t believe me.

This new trick worked pretty well when I tested it out on some of my buddy Two Pints' female clients recently. Of course, my natural charm had a large part to do with, it but I knew they were hooked when they kept pestering me about what their blood types meant.

One was particularly interested and jokingly told me hers was “AAA”. To those unfamiliar with bloodtype-pedia, “A” means shy.

But, just as the party was getting into full swing, Two Pints brought us all back to earth with a bump. Everyone was still laughing at the triple-A joke when my buddy’s banking instincts took over and he blurted out: “Oh you must be Temasek then!”

And there the conversation ended. Kung Hei Fat Choi!